A Mormon (Feminist!) Image: Loving my Body
I had never liked my body through my teen years and my early twenties. The feminist in me is ashamed just thinking about my younger self, obsessing over every curve and dimple, complaining about my boney knees, my not-slim-enough waist, my big nose, etc. etc.
Motherhood changed that. Both of my pregnancies taught me to appreciate the miracle that my body is. As I grew a life within my womb, I came to appreciate my legs for their strength, my ample waist for the child that it protected. I saw my body as one of Heavenly Father’s many miracles. My body can do so many things. I can keep up with my two-year-old, sing him songs, dance with him. I can nurse my three-month-old and carry her around for hours on my hip. With the help of my sweet husband, we have made a family. It still blows me away to see what miracles I can achieve. Granted, motherhood made my waist a bit more ample and my hips a bit curvier. I am still wearing my maternity pants and hoping that I can put them in a box eventually, but each time I want to complain, I think of the gift that I have been given. I may not always like how it looks, but life is teaching me that what I do with my body far outweighs how nice it looks in a swimsuit. I want to use this amazing body of mine to mother, to love, to work, to help. I want to be an example to my daughter of someone who truly respect and appreciates the amazing gift that my body is. I want to learn to smile at myself in the mirror rather than focusing on the rolls or dimples that sometimes scream for my attention. I want to truly appreciate this amazing gift that I have been blessed with
.
The picture was taken by my photographer friend, Kim Barlow (kimsrealportraits.com ), while I was pregnant with my daughter. My family was playing on the beach at Carkeek Park in Seattle, and I think this image captures those feelings of gratitude that I feel as a mother.
Submitted by RJ
This photograph is part of our ongoing series highlighting images from our readers lives. Comments to the post are encouraged. In addition we invite you to submit your own images to the Mormon Image series. Rules and instructions, including submissions guidelines, can be found here.
beautiful picture.
okay I can’t resist. OUCH is the baby standing on your spine and pointing straight out? your back…ouch…
Comment by britt — December 29, 2009 @ 12:40 pm
What a beautiful picture.
Comment by Lawyer Lady — December 29, 2009 @ 1:00 pm
I love pregnant bellies. You are beautiful.
Comment by mk7 — December 29, 2009 @ 1:39 pm
Looooove that picture!! So pretty!
Comment by Tressa — December 29, 2009 @ 2:28 pm
You always look great no matter what! Plus, your attitude makes you even more beautiful
Comment by Bethany — December 29, 2009 @ 2:37 pm
Simply lovely.
Comment by Tracy M — December 29, 2009 @ 2:48 pm
What is not to like? you are drop dead gorgeous, and I am sure you were all along. What I learned at BYU is even the gorgeous girls had issues. It sort of helped me let go of mine. If they were going to feel all that conflicted then I had a choice. I could feel terrible in comparison to gorgeous girls who didn’t feel all that good about themselves, or I could be good to me. I chose being nice to myself, and start putting less emphasis about what anyone looked like. But, seriously, that is beautiful!
Comment by Melissa P. — December 29, 2009 @ 2:49 pm
I remember this one time that I married this girl and she was drop-dead gorgeous. We got married, had a couple of kids, and she is still drop-dead gorgeous. You can see her pictured above.
Comment by Madly In Love — December 29, 2009 @ 3:32 pm
That picture is amazing. You’re beautiful and your photographer friend is, too.
Comment by Kristen — December 29, 2009 @ 3:44 pm
Wow. I agree with #1. That is one big baby. But I hear it is a good thing when they stick out like that rather than crush your internal organs (like my son did — my kidneys are permanently damaged).
Comment by StillConfused — December 29, 2009 @ 3:55 pm
Wow- I’m so flattered to see my submission on here. Thank you.
Thank you for all of the kind comments. To #1 and #10- My husband is 6′6 and our babies always tend to be huge. It also doesn’t help that I have almost no waist- it’s like my legs are hooked to my shoulders, so there isn’t really anywhere to go but out. All the cocoa butter in the world couldn’t keep away those stretch marks. But that’s okay- they are my battle wounds. I might miss them if they were gone.
Comment by RJ — December 29, 2009 @ 4:08 pm
You are beautiful inside and out. Thanks for sharing.
Comment by K Barlow — December 29, 2009 @ 4:16 pm
What a gorgeous picture! Looks good, is in good taste all over, and you’re really beautiful!
I realize especially some men find it difficult to see pregnant women as desirable, but as for myself, I can’t understand it (doesn’t mean I’m lusting after you now…).
I’ve always told my wife to be proud of every sign of having born babies; they’re hard-earned victory marks; if nothing else, they’re a sign of at least victory from selfishness and childishness.
And my heart goes out to all those, who can not experience that despite their will.
Comment by Velska — December 29, 2009 @ 6:48 pm
… at least partial victory …
My left index finger was a little too fast here.
Comment by Velska — December 29, 2009 @ 6:49 pm
Husband who is 6′6″. One word - Ouch. I remember breaking up with a guy once because he had a huge head and I couldn’t bear the thought of having his children. (Okay I was too young to marry at the time, but the story sounds better without that dose of reality).
Also, my youngest is 19 now. And my stretch marks have really gone away with age.
Comment by StillConfused — December 29, 2009 @ 7:16 pm
Love the picture!
Comment by Kevin Barney — December 29, 2009 @ 8:18 pm
The image shows the grace you embody, which is what makes you a beautiful young woman and a loving mother.
Comment by Mema — December 29, 2009 @ 8:54 pm
StillConfused, my baby crushed my kidney too! Did this happen to you with multiple pregnancies or just once?
RJ, you are beautiful. I love pregnant bellies. My husband said he never found me as sexy as when I was carrying his child.
Comment by Sofia — December 29, 2009 @ 9:15 pm
RJ,
Your thoughts and feelings moved me.
Thank you.
~S
Comment by siskisses — December 29, 2009 @ 9:16 pm
You’re beautiful! and what a fun surprise to see that one of my friend reads FMH too.
Comment by juniper — December 30, 2009 @ 12:01 am
#8 - Madly in Love - What a sweet thing to say about your wife, and you’re right; she is beautiful, inside and out.
Comment by Valory — December 30, 2009 @ 12:58 am
I agree with all the comments so far, but I really can’t believe that nobody has said anything about your hair yet. It’s fabulous.
Comment by Morgan Lee — December 30, 2009 @ 3:28 pm
That’s what I kept wanting to comment on. I wish I had hair like that! It’s beautiful.
(the whole picture is a beautiful image of pregnancy)
Comment by Alliegator — December 30, 2009 @ 3:46 pm
Awwww schucks. Anytime I need an ego-boost, I’ll just reread all of these comments.
Comment by RJ — December 30, 2009 @ 5:11 pm
I agree, the photo is beautiful.
re: stretch marks
For years, I’ve heard the women around me lament their stretch marks. It saddens me. I don’t think they should be seen as defects, or even battle scars or war wounds, as I’ve heard some women refer to them. They are marks of your womanhood, symbols of your femininity. They should be embraced as a sign of the whole you.
Comment by Derek — December 30, 2009 @ 7:19 pm
This photo speaks to me:
Earth
Water
Sky
Light
Life
Comment by Lianne — December 31, 2009 @ 2:55 pm
Thank you RJ, for the gift you are to your family and for the beautiful grandchildren that you have given to our family.
We appreciate your sharing your spirit and the love in your heart.
A bird does not sing because she has an answer,
She sings because she has a song.
(quote by Barbara Johnson)
Comment by Jo — January 1, 2010 @ 3:26 pm
The above picture is a poem,a symphany,a story.To repeat that you are beyond beautiful,would be redundant-but facts are facts.I was moved mightily,because you look so much like my wife in that picture,hair and all.I thought of how tender I felt toward her when she was with child,I thought how the years have not remotely diminished her physical beauty-she is a freak of nature.NOBODY believes she is 61,seems like a REALLY GOOD 42 or so.But it is her inner beauty,the soul that counts and her soul is deep,broad and unfathomable.She loves her children and grandchildren,she loves Christ and has a sweet,kind nature.Yes,she can build a deck or install a new kitchen,but she swoons over flowers and small children.
I never,for one minute now,take her for granted or don’t treasure my minutes with her.She is a gift and a blessing.No matter the trials,if she is there,they are light.
Comment by G.HAMILTON HILL — January 1, 2010 @ 4:47 pm
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Pingback by Natural Family Blog » Blog Archive » Feminist Mormon Housewives — January 2, 2010 @ 7:03 pm
Love this post and what a beautiful picture! My friend has a website that addresses body issues among mothers. www.theshapeofamother.com
Comment by Sara — January 3, 2010 @ 8:38 pm
Hello,The theme of your blog is very fit to me, I hope more alternate with you this Motive.
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